I Am Trying To Break Your Sex Laws #6

I’m fairly sure my boyfriend is asexual. He says he’s not a teenage boy and has more important shit to do than have sex. So my question is, at what point of the day would be the best time to bring up the whole “I’m going to go screw around but you’ll know about it so therefore can’t dump me and/or move out”?

Most sincerely yours,

Jane Austen.

Hope this helps, Ms. Austen:

Accessories Not Included

John steps out of the bathroom, his six pack thirsting for my mouth. I look below his waist and see Jockeys that match his tan. He looks as hung as me.

“Um, John…where’s your…where’s your cock?”

He walks closer to me and puts his right index finger on my lips. “Shhhhhh, call me Ken, ok?” John reaches under my pillow and pulls out panties that match my skin tone. “Put these on, please?” I push his arm away from my mouth. I scramble out of bed, put on my clothes. I don’t care if everyone can see my t-shirt backwards or that my bra will stick out of my back pocket. I don’t want to know how he got those panties. I’ll never trust Cara to set me up on another blind date ever again.

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